I woke up at 5am this morning. After tossing, turning and rearranging the placement of my feet both inside and outside of my sheets, I finally came to the conclusion that sleep was not on the agenda for the remainder of the night. But instead of counting sheep, or playing on my phone until my eyes got heavy, I started to let the orchestra of my thoughts play in my head, in hopes that they’d put me to sleep like the nursery rhymes to an infant. The symphony began with conversations about life, idleness, and purpose. Those conversations soon turned into questions, except each question was left vacant from response simply because I had no answers. It was ironic to me that I had run out of the usual ideas, conclusions, and revolutions that I so confidently used to give myself. But before the chorus of my thoughts could repeat itself, frustration took over causing me to ask out loud, “Why am I here? What is my purpose?”, only for me to be left without an answer, yet again. And with no response and the inability to answer my own questions, I turned over and proceeded to play on my phone, pressing stop on the track of my introspects and disappearing into what physically lied before me. However much to my surprise, I stumbled on a verse that soon put me at the breakfast table with God Himself. Psalm 139:15-16, which pretty much says, Hey you! “You were not a mistake. For all your days are written in my book”. Astonished at the timeliness of that message, I immediately started praying in advance that my purpose become clear and that I’d never lose fight nor faith. It finally had dawned on me: The scripts of our lives are already written and God made us perfect. Yes, we sin. Yes, we make mistakes. But we are not mistakes, therefore we each serve a purpose for being here on earth, whether that purpose is clear to us or not. Our purpose may be to impact the life of another or it may be to embody a talent or gift. Regardless, things will not be aligned in my life until I work on being aligned with my purpose and until I give myself 100% to Him, so that I can learn to see. I need not to lose faith in myself, because that would ultimately mean that I’m losing faith in Him. The answer to my question finally became clear to me, God just wants to see how much faith I’ll put into my fight, in order to promote me to the next level of my destiny. The only question that I need to answer is, “will I surrender to him?”. (2.23.13, Saturday, Post #200)
